Sachiniti

Kaveeta Kaul

India is in a state of extreme confusion…as yet undecided on the one issue that is the national obsession, namely ‘sex’.While the average citizen seems to have attained adulthood considering the relaxed disposition, not going into a frenzy every time the ‘words’ mentioned, our politicians who have recently donned the mantle of moral custodians, are struggling between the Middle and Dark ages, frothing at the mouth, incensed over Valentines day, huddled couples on the sea front and so on.

Rather contagious, presumably, this sudden obsession with controlling public behaviour. The schools have caught on the viral.

So school children have henceforth been directed to be off bounds from each other.

By a new directive, flashed all over the television channels, schools such as Jamnabai Narseemonji, and Vibgyor (?) have passed a regulation that does not allow boys and girls from having any bodily contact whatsoever..no holding hand, hugging etc.
This is absurd..just what do they hope to achieve? By striking out such a ridiculous ‘lakshman rekha’ these officiandos are in fact screamingly drawing attention to the divide between the two. Its not as if the kids were resorting to objectionable activities in the school premises! What happens after school hours? what if they, in vengeance decide to make repair for lost time ? Who /what can control them then? And whatever does pull the reins in then, would/should do so in school as well…namely? Coming to that in a mo!

I bet the kids, previous to this idiotic directive may have not bothered to train their thoughts along these lines.. Preeti, Pinky, Manasi , Manini may have been viewed as chummy as Ajay, Deepak, Ashok ..Peers are often just peers!

Look, this is a matter of family grooming, and personal conduct. There logically are more incidents of violence and harassment, in an environment that is unduly strict. We ought to bring up our kids with values intact, a strict moral code, set by example.

Be.. what you would like your children to be.

In a milieu where youth is open to various influences, from the net, media, cinema, Tv, it is only and only upbringing that can provide the necessary checks and balances which ensure responsible advent into adulthood.

Such debasing regulations only insidiously suggest to a child that he is in a prison like set up where he is under the scanner since his trustworthiness is suspect!! What a bummer! And moreso when the parents themselves are agreeing vociferously.. ‘yes yes.. please teach our child how to behave” is what their assent suggests!! I guess the parents need growing up more than the kids!

There are two schools which have been vying for top honors since..forever.Jamnabai and Maneckji Cooper..they have always been at loggerheads..a kind of healthy competition where alumni from each believed their alma mater to be the best. Maneckji Cooper was my alma mater, as also my daughter’s! I fervently hope that this strange rule is not adopted by my school.

When we treat children like adults, patiently point out the good from the bad, sift out desirable behaviour from that which is undesirable, inculcate a sense of healthy respect for the opposite sex, and provide sensible sex education classes where the importance of caring, love, respect, culminating in marriage, is imparted, there will be no requirement for laws which say ‘dont touch me because I am a girl’!! As if by not touching, a devious mental construct, if already present is going to instantly vanish!! And as if a good natured hug, or holding hands meant the kid had sex on his mind!! Its incredibly insane this rule.

One would have liked to believe that schools were the space where children found their inner strength, discovered their talents, grew to realise their potent capabilities which would enhance their self esteem…all of these factors so essential in shaping the final product, that of a healthy adult, ready to take on the world and the challenges it throws up. None of this can be achieved by belittling their own sense of right and wrong!!

Schools ought not to take over duties which parents ought to carry out responsibly. I remember opting to study in an all girls college ‘Sophia’s, despite holding a distinction and a precedent in my family of studying at St. Xaviers.. my sister and even my Uncle passed out from Xaviers. But I was adamant.. It was a choice that my father was so amused by, that he requested me to think over, again and again. But I was happy with the decision..It turned out to be a right one.. I topped the college all through and the University in my Final year. this was because it was a personal decision, not one enforced on me.

Lets dignify our upbringing by providing our children with dignity and respect, no matter their age. One can be astonished at just how well they would respond. Instead these schools are making them believe that they consider them little better than animals, who need to be put on a leash..

Disappointing, to say the least!!..Tsk.. tsk

The only moral lesson which is suited for a child, the most important lesson for every time of life, is this: “Never hurt anybody.”..Dennis Breeze.

If he gets this one right, he will do no wrong !!