October 14, 2006

Aishwarya-Uneasy Lies The Head……

Filed under: Movies,Of men women and Eunuchs,personal,Relationships,This Gets To Me — Kaveeta Oberoi Kaul @ 1:11 pm

One of the lessons I’d imbibed early in life was the transcience of all things materialistic. Included in that categorisation was, believe-it-or-not, fame,’fickle fame on a shifty plate’ It frightened, unnerved, rattled me. Something within, made me cringe at every opportunity that remotely led toward the direction of an in-the-face existence. That it would always be accompanied with ‘baggage’ of the undesirable, had made a dent deep enough in my psyche. ‘Peace of mind’ I had convinced myself, was an antonym to ‘popularity’..oxymorons.I chose the former with complete conviction.

Considered fodder for gossip and meat for shutterbug happy scribes, was not an idea that went down well with the romanticised imagery of life as envisaged.

Two decades later, I react in much the same way. Given a choice between a life in the hills, in the bosom of natural suroundings, tending to a personal garden, leading a quiet secluded, obscure life, over one which spelt a fast paced, glitzy, flashy one, I’d most definitely opt for the quieter, all over again. Mumbai does this to you. If you are a keen learner, sharp observer, then much can be achieved in a short span of time..sometimes even maturity.

It has often been sagely averred that personal and professional life of stars are at loggerheads for most part of their journey. Successfully attaining both is tightrope walking, with no guarantee of a positive outcome. For those to who reaching a nadir professionally is the priority and raison d’etre of their being, this post will hold no interest..not even cursory. However, some subscribe to the rationale of personal happiness taking unflinching precedence over worldly acclaim..especially if the price includes a total and complete surrender of privacy into the hands of a sensation-at-any-cost-crazy media catering to an eager-to- swallow-celeb-hype-public.

Recently, Aishwarya Rai was in the news for two reasons, One, the much awaited ‘Umrao Jaan’ pre-release publicty was at its peak. Second , not so comforting was the reported ‘telling off’ she received by Jaya Bachchan, her supposedly soon to be mother in law, on arriving late at a sit in dinner at their home . My first reaction was amamzement at the news leak. One cannot imagine media presence in the private precincts of the Bachchan residence, where it was alleged to have occurred. Second reaction was disgust, frankly. Exactly, where do these guys who report draw the line on ethical and responsible news making.

Considering the privacy of the moment, not only is the credibility of the news at stake, but the fan fare following the incident, if indeed it had taken place, an incident hardly deserving of raking up such a fuss. Are we as a nation so sunken as to enjoy a rebuke by a senior to a junior on punctuality..or is it the innate love of gossip that excites the darker side, savouring the fact that the great Ms. Rai, was not so great for the B family and most of all revelling in the disclosure that a saas bahu saga was about to emerge from this tip of the iceberg.

Eitherway, it was annoying. For a relationship as delicate as a fiancee and the soon to be in-laws, this rather embarassing scandal can create ripples. Its mischievous to the core. Lack of strength, and steely nerve required to tolerate this infringement on a persons private life, has led to many a marriage falling apart, relationships crumbling under the constant, relentless glare of media attention, and life taking on precarious curves, at the slightest provocation.

“Public Property’ is the reason ascribed boldly,brazenly, blithely to this shameful intrusion. If the media transports you to dizzying heights of unadulterated adulaton, then it has accorded itself the privilege of simultaneously ripping your privacy, critically monitoring every move and gate crashing into your emotional cloud, as and when it suits them…

A celebrity may live in an insulated bubble, but they hold the pins.

If you have opted to be an actor, then the tacit surrender of your private life is a given..sad. I suspect that the performing community would have witnessed a qualitative upward graph, had the media and its scandalous attributes not been a hardened reality, indigestible to those to who the love for acting was a passion, but a decent, respectable, peaceful way of life an uncompromisingly obsessive need.

You win some, you lose some..whoever said life is a bed of roses..even if you are the most beautiful woman in the world or the Queen of England..The media can be a great equalizer..Diana or Aishwarya..who cares? Sharks with teeth sharpened for a ‘byte’ need their prey.


  1. Oh yes..the merry go round has begun..for the media..poor Abhishek..will he wont he? take up for Ash i mean..Id hate to be in his shoes.

    Comment by sanjay — October 15, 2006 @ 9:16 am | Reply

  2. well said!

    Comment by puja — October 15, 2006 @ 1:56 pm | Reply

  3. @sanjay.Immediately thought of Abhishek haan? HMMM..

    @Puja,Why thank you! havent heard from you for a while.

    How have u been? problems sorted? EM ME.

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — October 15, 2006 @ 11:43 pm | Reply

  4. Media can be a double edged sword all right. As for Saas bahu Jaya should remember that woh bhi kabhi young thi and not make a mountain out of a molehill. Maybe Ash will now remember ki woh bhi kahi late hoti thi.

    Comment by Hiren — October 16, 2006 @ 10:22 am | Reply

  5. they even scan, nope! read ur email before u get ’em! the gmail geeks:)
    read the dan brown buk ‘digital fortress’? mite be fiction but then not far from life also!
    the eyez n ears of the virtual demon sees, peeps in2 every ‘byte’ of it!
    but why only the creme-de la creme? common man is also tagged. therez nothin called absolute privacy.. but ya the glam n the page 3 head turners sumtimes aint too happy wit the ‘cochie-coo’ moments flashed in media. again u really cant have best of both the worldz naa.. hence the lights are trained on always! sumtimes these r mere stories also just to keep the cash flowin in2 those hollow stables of filmfare n stuff.
    per se privacy has taken a beating.. am not bothered abt ash ray.. abt mine am scared πŸ™‚
    but as again a student of science i know.. the eveil is within us! coz we only drive this system-again, its we, the people who sacres me- they are reading all these too πŸ™‚

    Comment by saptarshi — October 16, 2006 @ 12:59 pm | Reply

  6. Hi hiren
    True..although the certainty of the event having taken place is riddled by a question mark.Also the sequence or the pitch.. in a coud and always open to exaggeration.

    Hi Saptarshi,

    Two points made by you are indeed thought worthy. First the internet and its uncanny ability to penetrate through our virtual life. Second the people curiosity..its scary. Either the media develops a conscience( doubtful) or the audience rejects puerile stuff (doubtful, as well)!

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — October 16, 2006 @ 2:43 pm | Reply

  7. Absolutely well written, great points, fact and definately a media frenzy-issue!! We face the same sort of media craziness here in Canada.. especially in the USA; that it makes one wonder, is anything worth the price of freedom?

    with loving kindness,

    Comment by North — October 17, 2006 @ 8:41 am | Reply

  8. doubtful aplenty πŸ™‚
    watz the price of fame? watz the prize of fame? sumwhere we have lost the subtle pun intended πŸ™‚
    anyway guess the beauz out there work the negative publicity in gud stead… or en mass we are too tired of our own pretty biospherez n tryin to climb up the christmas trees, aimlessly! but if ya know how to carry the crown.. wo! jolly well it sits tite n adorable.. sumwhere ash has had her share of spites..

    the day ill EARN my crown, ull see πŸ™‚ ill invite u to my durbar for a cuppa.. coffee or tea ur choice!

    Comment by saptarshi — October 17, 2006 @ 1:17 pm | Reply

  9. Hi North..personalities seldom differ, irrespective of man made boundaries.Our foibles are starkly distinguishable. Shouldnt that therefore facilitate understanding n peace n love n all of those noble sentiments?? Wishful thinking..I know.

    Hi Saptarshi,

    Durbar..N chai?? Think us to South of France:)

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — October 17, 2006 @ 3:34 pm | Reply

  10. Sometimes all we have to cling to.. is wishful thinking!

    I’m all for Paris too; hope you are fluent! : )

    Comment by North — October 18, 2006 @ 8:49 am | Reply

  11. Un Peu..Madamoiselle..J’essaye a parler Francais:)

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — October 18, 2006 @ 2:06 pm | Reply

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