May 8, 2007

Abhi Ash Wedding – Bachchans Take On Bollywood



Kaveeta Kaul

My personal gossip news vine is Shirin- a beautician who comes by once a month, to help satisfy my compulsive vain urges. The fact that she is also a favourite with other filmi folk lends to the credibility of spicy tidbits interspersed with her routine, which she offers most willingly, free of cost. Mostly its a with my eyes closed, trying earnestly to relax away my blues while she chatters away undeterred..Responsiveness is not a criteria she bothers herself much with…and neither is she impressed with subtle piquant wit. I often sense the similarity with the Vijay-Basanti (Sholay) catatonic syndrome.. y’know what I mean.

I have been out for a good coupla weeks, is all I had to inform her by way of an opening statement. ‘Oh!! you dont know what happened at the Ash-Abhi wedding?” She asked with genuine astonishment. I had left the same day, I informed casually, not willing to invite a blow by blow account I suspect I had . She shook her head in disbelief. After having made quick arrangements of dipping my feet into the basin, readying her tools for the pedicure, placing the napkin neatly around , she began, without any further delay or inducement.

The industry she informed is boiling over with rage and insult at having been shunned off the invitee list. It was a well advertised fact by then that the wedding was to be a smallish affair attended by the close and personal family and friends. I had known of the fact that the number was a concise 300 or so.. which by any standards is a rather tiny aggregate. So what was the fuss about , I asked disconnectedly.

Shirin seemed aghast at my nonchalance..She almost stopped cuticl-ing..with me fervently twiddling my little toesy to draw her attention. But no..she looked back accusedly and continued.. “Imagine not calling Shahrukh ..and what of Prakash Mehra.. the man gave AB his break.. and also Ramesh Sippy..and neighbours like Dharmendra and Shatrughan Sinha..He ignored them as well..”

But its his sons wedding and he has a right to decide the guest list..I argued. Shirin obviously by now had decided not to pay attention to the blasphemy. She continued agitatedly..” And you know what.. He sent them all a box of Mithai..which the whole industry has returned!!” At this I opened my eyes ..taking this as a cue she carried on with ” Prakash Mehra came on T.V. and declared that he can send another 200 such boxes of Mithai to AB and he does not need it.. all the others have returned it as well.. SRK and all”.. I knew I could safely divide her talks by half at least…as far as proportion to truth vs gossip was concerned.

However, ..did they really send back the mithai box?! How Appalling! I mean why be such spoil sports? The guy was having a celebration at his bungalow which could not have accomodated more than the said number. Also he is known to be a private person. Why give out such blatant inimical vibes at such an auspicious moment of his life? Frankly I felt it was in poor taste that the industry, if it is so, decided to make known their displeasure, thus.

To know that the world knows is always cause for major annoyance. The fraternity is reacting to the public acknowledgement of their conspicuous absence. Its akin to being rebuked in full media and public glare. But this was one occasion in which they could have taken solace in numbers.There were more rejects than invitees.. so why fret?

AB is being increasingly accused of getting rough around the edges and adopting a high and mighty air post the success of ‘Guru’. This rather rebellious non conformation to Bollywood dictats has added fuel to the already raging fire. Although Ajay Devgan and Kajol, behaved much the same way at their wedding.. closed affair.. 50 people..only family..not even Rani Mukherji, first cousin. Nobody really threw a fit was dismissed as ‘personal choice’. Why had this excuse/logicality not been applicable for the Bachchans?

I doubt if Amitabh Bachchan would have chosen to behave in such a petulant manner had he been the recipient or rather non-recipient of an invitation. This is not to imply that he is saintly or benign. On the contrary, AB is known to have an elephantine memory and never forgives. But undoubtedly to make a public display of his grouse would not have been a choice worth reckoning.

And aah Shirin.. I made this known to her in as passionate a tone I could summon. She’d realised by now that I was incensed and also that she was totally in disagreement. She fumed silently.. my poor toes bore the brunt as also my aching muscles ( bout of extra brisk walk and weights at the gym) I had never ever received such a vigorous foot massage. By now there was deathly silence.

She continued to complete her routine.. there was Peace finally..for me.. In fact she had to awaken me after the body massage..By then I dreamfully had visited the know who ..Bachchans..sat through a tete a tete with Jaya complaining of the ‘rude industrywallahs’..and her rights to acknowledge and dismiss the presence of who she wished at the wedding of her only son..

Shirins sullen face brought me back to ground zero.. I gave her an extra tip.. and a hug.. as well as a recommendation.. She meant no harm.. poor girl.. She was responding at the level of the ego..which is only fair.. I told her so. .and tried to soften by suggesting that life is too short to expect ..give..openly for the sheer joy of it..unconditionally . Now Ab hasn’t invited me.. but do you detect even a whiff of a complaint? Au contraire!


For those hugely fascinated with the romance of their wedding..alongside please find the vodpod..



  1. I have always considered the bollywood brigade to be quite a bunch of birdbrains.Much ado about nothing.Would Hollywood bigwigs have responded in a similar fashion? Not a chance.Enjoyed the was fun!

    Comment by dilip — May 8, 2007 @ 4:46 pm | Reply

  2. But I think that Ab could have done better.. what is he? a kanjoos? he stepped on so many toes for nothing.Yeah agree with Dilip…. fun read 🙂

    Comment by Neha — May 9, 2007 @ 8:52 am | Reply

  3. One cannot eat his cake and have it too. I agree that Ajay/Kads insisted on a very private wedding, but the reason why no one minded is because they did not hire a zillion PR guys to ram down the wedding into everyone’s throat. They did not profess one thing in public and do another thing behind everyone else’s back. If this is Big B’s idea of keeping things private then he is a moron. I personally do not think he is a moron, I think he is a very dodgy character. He wanted to milk every last drop of mileage out of this wedding, “kill multiple birds with one stone”. Unfortunately it was at other people’s expense. Hence the fraternity got outraged. It takes a lot for the industry to lash out at one of its own, especially someone as successful as Big B. I think with his Machiavellian underhandedness, Big B crossed the line of decency.

    I personally feel that Big B will live to regret this.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 9, 2007 @ 9:12 am | Reply

  4. Hi Dilip,

    True.. havent really heard of similar bursts of outrage in Hollywood..where most marriages are really private.

    Hi Neha,

    I dont think it has anything to do with being kanjoos or economic considerations for that matter. There were too many factors to be considered I guess. Salman and Ashs affair.. Vivek and then the connecting friend circle. It kinda must have overlapped.

    Hi Shaan’

    do you really think that a ‘zillion Pr guys’ were hired or for that matter, needed to be hired? The media was in a frenzy willing to get a glimpse of Ash’s fleeting saree fall! I am doubtful if Ab would have spent a penny for coverage of any kind. Juhu isnt too far away from where I live and I can safely say that all efforts to keep it private were the only efforts coming out of the Ab Amar Singh camp.. As for Machiavellian underhandedness.. I donno really. But I think there is more to it than meets the eye if you begin to think of industry lashing out or also on the reason for invitees. Think Congress and SP.. Gandhis and Amar Singh.. SRK and Sonia..get my point?

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — May 9, 2007 @ 9:55 am | Reply

  5. There would always have been someone who wasnt invited n the bloke would have gone to town mouthing profanities.
    If the couple wanted privacy as what we get to hear also mentioned by Taran Adarsh then so be it!
    The mithai boxes was meant to soften the hurt of those who werent invited.It was merely a gesture, not a compensation.I know the family well.They meant no harm.Belive u me.

    Comment by Anonymous — May 9, 2007 @ 11:24 am | Reply

  6. Finally Abhi-Ash got married and it was a great relief to the entire nation.We were constantly bombarded with all the ‘wanted’ and ‘unwanted’ details of the wedding… Honestly the whole three days it was Ash Abhishek ,Jalsa ,Prateeksha,La mer,Amar blah blah.It is the media tobe blamed for over doing it.Hmm.. Amitabh says he wants to keep the wedding a low profile event and a private affair but it turns out be public….I was surprised to see Ash wearing a kanchivaram saree not a heavy weight designer saree on the D-day.Some years back Hrithik got married in B’lore not many top stars attended his wedding then.. SRK ,Amitabh …..long list weren’t invited but nobody spoke about it then .So was the case with Aamir-kiran and no one complained but now with Ash-Abhi all are upset .why? Ash hasn’t spoken a single word till now on neither her engagement nor her wedding which was nice and i loved it .Whatever it is ,i wish Ash and Abhishek all the best .GOD BLESS THEM.

    Comment by Aneesh — May 9, 2007 @ 11:46 am | Reply

  7. It was shame on the media to bring the issue of salman and vivek even on the wedding day. It’s fact she dated them but what about Abhishek and his past karisma,Dipanita etc.. Why always Ash is accused of being manipulative and changing boy friends?what about bipasha and sushmitha who also it did the same thing and why nobody speaks about them ?why Ash bashing goes on and on in the media?why is she such a soft target?May its easy accusing a woman who has made it all on her own and without any God father. All these things over the years have made her much stronger person.God bless her.

    Comment by nitin — May 9, 2007 @ 12:00 pm | Reply

  8. anese uske aaye bahaar ..
    jaane se uske jaye bahaar…
    bade mastani hai abhishek ki aishwarya…

    —-gustaki maf ho

    Comment by anonymous — May 9, 2007 @ 12:19 pm | Reply

  9. Signs of “hired guns” building, guiding & stroking media frenzy is evident. This was a managed event (every aspect of it). Yes, there were multiple objectives, but the stench of political and bizniz rivalry will be the legacy by which this wedding will be remembered.

    Blinded by a “get even” fever Big B failed to comprehend that this is a different era, a younger set controls THE studio and sets the agenda. His old ways of getting away with atrocities may have been tolerable to the benign older generation, but is not welcome today.

    Amongst the blunders that Big B committed was the cardinal sin of beating up journalists. This will haunt him forever. In years to come it will be said that “Big B beat up journalist to get Ash home before sunset, in later years he beat on Salman’s door to get her home before sunrise”

    Now wait for spills and slips. Next the inside story by the inside man……..the saga will continue.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 9, 2007 @ 5:14 pm | Reply

  10. Hi kaveeta,

    i want to know what you have to say on comments like these—

    “Big B beat up journalist to get Ash home before sunset, in later years he beat on Salman’s door to get her home before sunrise”

    -I felt it was in bad taste

    Comment by suraj — May 9, 2007 @ 7:16 pm | Reply

  11. Suraj

    There are Streets in any given city where young children should not wonder around.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 9, 2007 @ 7:24 pm | Reply

  12. jahnavi episode that happened on the wedding day ,i felt she wasn’t a crazy fan .There must have been some mastermind behind the whole drama.. trying to upset the bride and the groom ….

    Comment by anusha — May 9, 2007 @ 7:46 pm | Reply

  13. Anusha

    It is very likely that Jahnavi is an opportunist, but then Lil C also is a Bachchan, and how can, pray tell, an apple fall very far from the tree ? Therefore to not hear her out and outright condemn her is very sad. I finally understand the meaning to Javed Sahab’s “Agle Janam Mohe Bitya Na Ki Jo…” Being just a man I was ignorant of the hurdles that society throws in the path of a typical women. It has now become clear to me that if you are a poor powerless woman, you are doomed. I am reminded of a saying I heard during my last trip to India, “Gareeb Ki Biwi Sub Ki Joroo”.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 10, 2007 @ 8:15 am | Reply

  14. Hi guys,

    Gosh I really seemed to have missed out on a lot with reference to the wedding. bashing up journos, Jahnavi (?) :0

    Aneesh yeah the examples of Hrithik and Aamir were relevant. Oh and you’ve also noticed Ash’s a guy you’re pretty perceptive..I believe rituals were performed according to the Bunt tradition which the Rais conform to…including the attire everything seemed traditional..Nice.

    Suraj.. well Shaan is someone whose comments are laced with piquancy.. as for taste. Coffee needs acquiring a taste for it as well 😉

    Shaan..apni rooh ki shaan se ru ba ru karvaiiye..Enjoy most of your observations.. To some of course my eyebrows ascend into the hairline and disappear beyond..but thats Ok..they love to wander too I guess 🙂

    I have no much details on the jahnavi episode anusha.but now that a husband has appeared asking for custody of their child which she kept hidden in kashmir, it seems like a silly attempt at media attention. I wonder why the channels do not bother to professionally verify claims before embarking on a full fledged sensational coverage.. Eyeballs dictate all!!

    Shaan I suggest you save your sympathy for a more worthy cause than Jahnavis.. BTW ‘agle janam’ is a song which has stirred my soul.. Javed saab has outdone himself. In fact This
    is something you should read if you haven’t already where the lyrics and their plaint came to mind .

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — May 10, 2007 @ 1:54 pm | Reply

  15. Perspective change depending on ones experience, and also depending on where one stands. Wise people look at Janavi and rightly recognize the covet for 15 minutes of fame. Hence I wonder where does this wisdom disappear when they fail to see back peddling. Could not the attempt now to paint Janavi as a looser be just a cover-up ? Should not we approach this from the viewpoint of “what is good for the goose is good for the gander”. Why different standards? Why a clean pass for Lil C and scorn for Janavi?

    All the above shenanigans remind me of when Tina Brown exposed the true state of Princess Di’s marriage. THE ROYALs send out assigns armed with poison pens to destroy Tina and her position. As it always happens, thanks to the clever cover-up, everyone then thought that Tina was a looser, out to make a quick buck by writing something sensational. Needless to say, today every word of Ms. Brown’s book has been validated.

    Imagine you are reading a mystery novel. The first chapter throws us a likely suspect, but we know by the time the final chapter comes along we will feel silly for falling for the trap. Hence hold your judgment, and ask for more evidence. Janavi may have been a looser, and perhaps that is why she was targeted by Lil C for a quickie. LilC knew that no one will ever believe Janavi because she is a poor, powerless woman. My friends the answer to this mystery as you will soon find out is that it was the Doodhwala Bhaiya from Allahbad who did it in the Kitchen with a spanner.

    Kaveeta, thanks for the bit on that song.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 10, 2007 @ 6:02 pm | Reply

  16. Hi kaveetha ,

    i humbly request you to read all the blogs of Mr. Little/Big ‘ S.K ‘

    Comment by anonymous — May 12, 2007 @ 3:55 pm | Reply

  17. Hi Anonymous,

    Would you care to elucidate please… Pertaining to what ?

    Shaan..the Jahnavi story is a lot of humbug..The guy has been engaged come she decides to create a ruckus on that particular day? Its not as if he suddenly dropped a bombshell. And puh lease.. take a cursory look at her .I mean no offense but why on earth would Abhi want anything to do with her? Coming from a man of the world kinda guy you appear to be.. this is a strange viewpoint…C’mon Shaan, you’re kidding right? ‘doodhwala Bhaiyya.. lol.. at the end of the saga is on the dot.

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — May 13, 2007 @ 12:54 pm | Reply

  18. Kaveetaa

    Explain to me why on the earth would Hugh Grant have anything to do with Divine Brown when he had Liz Hurley.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 13, 2007 @ 7:51 pm | Reply

  19. i happened to read this blog , another way of looking at the event:-

    Comment by Nitin — May 14, 2007 @ 2:32 pm | Reply

  20. “Big B beat up journalist to get Ash home before sunset, in later years he beat on Salman’s door to get her home before sunrise”

    ———-no matter what this is never going to happen , if not all atleast some of your wishes won’t be fulfilled mr.khan

    Comment by goutham — May 14, 2007 @ 2:54 pm | Reply

  21. Goutham

    My wish is that peace be upon you. May you never be mistaken for a journalist at the ceremonial “Beating up of Journalist” at a traditional “Bunt” style wedding.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 14, 2007 @ 5:23 pm | Reply

  22. Gautham:

    I was just thinking, what if Salman gets profoundly wounded by the selfish nature of his English Mem wife, and what if Lil C turns out to be too childish, do you think it could happen then ? I mean on a rainy day while Big B and Lil C were away in Allahabad doing a stage show with the ever refreshing Pretty Woman, singing “Where is the party tonight”, I mean…., like…., think about it. Never say Never, there is always some possibility. 🙂

    Chill bud, just a joke.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 14, 2007 @ 5:39 pm | Reply

  23. shaan khan,
    salman literally beaten journalists and also killed innocent animal and a mother lost her child (accident) coz of him n money can’t bring her son back there r innumerable instanes for his bad behaviour and this will to haunt him not just in this life but even in the coming …..why are you so partial towards the entire khandaan? coz they belong to your community …. , be rational and practical and just will get temporary happiness by verbal abuse thats it.

    Comment by goutham — May 14, 2007 @ 7:18 pm | Reply

  24. Hi kaveetha,

    plz do read all the blogs of mr.shaan khan,we all have likes and dislikes but hatred…in all his blogs ,you have to read them to believe me.He is the epitome of yellow bloggism.just read them.

    Comment by anonymous — May 14, 2007 @ 7:32 pm | Reply

  25. Gautham:

    I left India when I was very young. I was a second generation Desi. For many a reasons, my great grandfather chose to relocate from Brussels and retire in Bombay (a couple of years before India’s independence). My grandfather married around that time (in Bombay to a second generation Persian lady)and thanks to an absence of TV in Bombay, and a very driven grandfather, my father was born soon thereafter. My grandmother (she was a great story teller) told me once that even before her wedding song stopped playing in her mind, she heard the cries of my father’s birth.

    I am not a Khan. Shaan Khan is just my pen name. I am a US citizen of Lebanese descent (born in Bombay). The Bombay my family knew was always very liberal and non racial. Even today when I travel in India, I always come across Hindus who tell me of their Muslim friend, who they trust more than their own brother and likewise I come across Muslims with Hindu friends. Same can be said about almost all other communities. If only people explored making more friends rather than live in constant fear. It appears that most Desis are fighting mythical demons. In reality things have a huge potential to be better.

    Yes, Gautham I am a proud Muslim in my mosque (an during prayer times); Likewise I am a driven Man in the privacy of my bedroom during my intimate moments; and a patriotic US citizen on election day, on tax paying day and all the other days when I am called to be a good citizen. But on a daily basis I leave my gender, my faith and my citizen in check and deal with people just as a human. I connect to people as a human, I don’t see their faith, gender or nationality. If all you see in me is a Muslim or a Khan then it is your problem not mine.

    Take care.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 14, 2007 @ 7:50 pm | Reply

  26. Anonymous

    Hate is an acid that corrodes the very vessel that holds it. Na Na Balikaa, Krod it bad for health. Tch tch.

    Why cannot you just attack my position rather than attack me. Why does no one believes in freedom of expression, why censor ? Atleast I try to make it palatable with some humor. Tell me would you not want to live in a nation which tolerates 9 floozies like Janavi so that one innocent woman’s honor is protected ? This whole debate is about that. Try to see beyond the superficial facade. There is something real at stake here.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 14, 2007 @ 8:10 pm | Reply

  27. shaan,

    what do you have to say on salman and his unacceptable behaviour?if it was in any other nation , he would have been behind bars

    Comment by goutham — May 15, 2007 @ 7:44 am | Reply

  28. I think justice should be a deterrent and hence it needs to be swift and severe. Nonetheless under all circumstances justice needs to be fair & equal. For the crimes that Salman has committed, he should be punished but let us not just single out Salman. Let us punish all perps equally. Unequal justice is a mockery of justice.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 15, 2007 @ 8:15 am | Reply

  29. Hi Kaveetha,

    After reading all those comments , i remembered some of my favourite lines from one of my favourite books ‘The Alchemist’:

    “Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives , but none about his or her own.”

    “I’m like everyone else-I see the world in terms of what i would like to see happen , not what actually does.”

    -courtesy:Paulo Coelho ,’The Alchemist’

    – This applies to most of us including myself

    Comment by Rakesh — May 15, 2007 @ 11:26 am | Reply

  30. Ladies & Gentlemen, first a “sher” from this Akbar Allahabadi,

    “Girte Hai Ghoordh Sawar Maidaane Jung Mein
    ……Jo Ghutne Ke Bal Chalte Hai”

    Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Your applause has warmed the cockles of my heart. Hence, now lets proceed.

    With a little show of hand please tell me which of the following you agree with:

    1. Our Nation did itself proud by withholding its compassion for Janavi
    2. Under some circumstances beating up of Journalists is acceptable.
    3. Big B should be given a free pass for making the above two occur.

    You can choose more than one.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 15, 2007 @ 11:46 pm | Reply

  31. Shaan Khan,

    Shouldnt you be concerned with the state of our nation where criminals are being voted to power instead of these Bollywood types who constitute .0000000000000001% of our population? Who cares ? You want to show compassion for Jahnavi or whoever..Good.. Go send her a proposal.

    Comment by double barrel — May 16, 2007 @ 11:51 am | Reply

  32. Hey Shaan the ‘sher’ goes
    ‘girte hain ghudh savaar hi maidane-e-jung mein
    wof tifn kya gire jo ghutnon ke bal chale’
    and now you can continue raking in the applause.. wah wah masha allah..Kya khoob chuna hai 🙂

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — May 16, 2007 @ 12:30 pm | Reply

  33. DB:

    This weekend thousands of straight men, women and kids from all over the Tri-State area of NY/NJ/CT will collect in NYC for AIDS walk. According to your logic they should stay home and not care. Nonetheless as human we all have to pitch in to make our nation better. It is sacrifice, compassion and the ability to stand up for the truth that makes any country great. Never sit back because it is someone else’s problem, because all problems come knocking to your door step eventually.

    Peace and love to you DB

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 16, 2007 @ 5:15 pm | Reply

  34. Kaveetaa

    Thanks, but remember I am illiterate in Hindi/Urdu and other local Desi languages.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 16, 2007 @ 5:17 pm | Reply

  35. Ohh..thats come as a surprise Shaan. So you mean you see Bollywood films dependant solely on sub titles? That must be awful and especially those which have been ‘done’ in U.A.E. Often one enjoys the subtitling more than the film…it can be howl-arious 🙂

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — May 16, 2007 @ 5:35 pm | Reply

  36. No no.

    On experiencing the disadvantage of my grandfather’s handicap with the local language I overcompensated, nonetheless the fact I stayed in Bombay only for a short time (keeping going back for holidays and business) and the fact that I did not get a formal education in the local language has had its toll. I can carry on a conversation in the Bombaya flavor and some speak some Urdu thanks to a certain Khan icon of yester years whose home we frequented.

    Comment by Shaan Khan — May 16, 2007 @ 7:37 pm | Reply

  37. […] On the wedding and more  […]

    Pingback by All The World Loves A Lover- Aishwarya Abhishek To Wed « Sachiniti — May 22, 2007 @ 4:46 pm | Reply

  38. God bless them. Its really irritating calling Ash “manglik manglik” , our minds are so westernised that we don’t even know what our sun sign is according to Vedic astrology ,if some one is a scorpio (according to western astrology(oct23-nov 21) and this theory totally changes if we take into account vedic astrology ,time of birth is also very important.Actually these things are relative ,the media has been very unfair calling Ash ‘manglik’ time and again.Ash is poised and down to earth always.God bless her.

    Comment by anonymous — May 29, 2007 @ 12:41 pm | Reply

  39. Anonymous, if you ask my personal opinion, then its not as if ‘manglik’ is a complete humbug theory. Of course dependant on accurate time of birth, certain planetary configurations can create havoc in ones lives. But if you dont know of it, then all is well i guess. Like you said people often dont know of even their sun signs leave alone rashis based on moon placement.

    Perhaps you’d like to read this

    Comment by kaveetaakaul — May 29, 2007 @ 2:41 pm | Reply

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